I am concerned about the reputation of this great state of ours. I mean, we killed Kennedy, we are the home of the increasingly unpopular current President, we have more executions than any other state, it's hot here, we have that show Sheer Dallas making us all look like jack-asses, we've got the kids from the Real World down there in Austin getting in fights on 6th street for the world to see, and now we have mad cow disease. Hey tourists, git yer guns and come on down!
I want people to think Texas is cool. Let's all get together and make people like us again.
Thursday, June 30, 2005
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
Wheels-off Wednesday
Well, this weather has shot my wheels off completely. My garden needs so much work, and I just can't face it. Just a quick trip outside to water the shrubs about does me in. I'm gonna have to get up at like 5:00 am one day and just deal with it. What a drag.
Last night, as I was enjoying a delicious parfait of seasonal berries, I told Kev that about the only thing that made these heat-index-of-105 days bearable was fruit. I said berries are like a little gift from God to make up for the hot. Then Kev reminded me that people in cool climates also get to enjoy summer fruits. So there goes that. Dangit.
I tell you what. if I end up making a best-selling sock monkey book, I am going to buy Kev a kick-ass guitar, and then I am going to build my dream cabin on one of Maine's many lakes, and I will live there in the summer. Anyone is welcome to come and visit me. You will find me in the yard in my adirondack chair, which by the way I am going to build myself, looking at the loons or reading a book or having some blueberries.
That reminds me of when I worked at TeachSmart between college and grad school when I still didn't know what to do with my life. It was a cool concept...giant teacher super-store, with educational books and toys and art supplies and bulletin-board materials and so forth. Our store manager was a guy named Dennis, who I swear they used as the inspiration for Ned Flanders. When something went wrong, Dennis would say, "Oh, Potato Chips!" instead of dammit or something. The store owner/CEO was a rich guy named Jim, who had a series of toupees that he would change weekly to make it look like his hair was growing. At the end of the month, he'd go back to the short one, so people would think he got a haircut. A clever plan, but no-one was buying it.
Anyway at TeachSmart, we sold a series of soothing-sounds-of-the-environment CDs, and we had to play them in the store so people would hear them and want to buy them. One was called Classical Loon, and as the name implies, it was a CD of classical music, with occasional loon sounds dubbed in over top of it. Oh, I hated Classical Loon. I hated it so much that the other people who worked in the store would play it over and over just to annoy me. Now, I've changed my tune on loons. I think they are probably in my top 5 favorite birds. I'd love to have a copy of Classical Loon now so I could put it on and pretend I am in Maine in my adirondak chair on a cool summer day.
Oh, Potato Chips! Time to face the brutal outdoors and to go to work.
Last night, as I was enjoying a delicious parfait of seasonal berries, I told Kev that about the only thing that made these heat-index-of-105 days bearable was fruit. I said berries are like a little gift from God to make up for the hot. Then Kev reminded me that people in cool climates also get to enjoy summer fruits. So there goes that. Dangit.
I tell you what. if I end up making a best-selling sock monkey book, I am going to buy Kev a kick-ass guitar, and then I am going to build my dream cabin on one of Maine's many lakes, and I will live there in the summer. Anyone is welcome to come and visit me. You will find me in the yard in my adirondack chair, which by the way I am going to build myself, looking at the loons or reading a book or having some blueberries.
That reminds me of when I worked at TeachSmart between college and grad school when I still didn't know what to do with my life. It was a cool concept...giant teacher super-store, with educational books and toys and art supplies and bulletin-board materials and so forth. Our store manager was a guy named Dennis, who I swear they used as the inspiration for Ned Flanders. When something went wrong, Dennis would say, "Oh, Potato Chips!" instead of dammit or something. The store owner/CEO was a rich guy named Jim, who had a series of toupees that he would change weekly to make it look like his hair was growing. At the end of the month, he'd go back to the short one, so people would think he got a haircut. A clever plan, but no-one was buying it.
Anyway at TeachSmart, we sold a series of soothing-sounds-of-the-environment CDs, and we had to play them in the store so people would hear them and want to buy them. One was called Classical Loon, and as the name implies, it was a CD of classical music, with occasional loon sounds dubbed in over top of it. Oh, I hated Classical Loon. I hated it so much that the other people who worked in the store would play it over and over just to annoy me. Now, I've changed my tune on loons. I think they are probably in my top 5 favorite birds. I'd love to have a copy of Classical Loon now so I could put it on and pretend I am in Maine in my adirondak chair on a cool summer day.
Oh, Potato Chips! Time to face the brutal outdoors and to go to work.
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
TV-Watching is a Sport
Tonight I could watch either 1976's The Boy in the Plastic Bubble, starring a young John Travolta, or It Came from Outer Space...1950's sci-fi.
How ever will I decide?
UPDATE:
We watched the Sci-Fi, and it was great...campy and silly. I loved it. Plus, Kev said,"I'm not watchin' no Bubble Boy." I did flip over a couple of times to check in on Barbarino in a Bubble, and it was as cheesy as I thougt it would be. At the end, he goes to school wearing basically a space-suit with an air-tank, and he talks through a little screen like Darth Vader, only less cool. Anyway, I recommend It Came from Outer Space if you are in the mood for 90 minutes of low-budget special effects and some sinister theramin music that lets you know when the martian is nearby.
How ever will I decide?
UPDATE:
We watched the Sci-Fi, and it was great...campy and silly. I loved it. Plus, Kev said,"I'm not watchin' no Bubble Boy." I did flip over a couple of times to check in on Barbarino in a Bubble, and it was as cheesy as I thougt it would be. At the end, he goes to school wearing basically a space-suit with an air-tank, and he talks through a little screen like Darth Vader, only less cool. Anyway, I recommend It Came from Outer Space if you are in the mood for 90 minutes of low-budget special effects and some sinister theramin music that lets you know when the martian is nearby.
To the Locals
Have any of you ever been to the Stockyards over in Fort Worth? If so, please review. Any ideas for a place that is Texas-y or Western to show our Long Island visitors next month. Something like the Alamo, but closer. Dallas is unfortunately mostly malls. Not very cowboy.
Hit or Miss
Sometimes Sirius First Wave plays a good song that I had forgotten all about. Like today they played Reptile by the Church. I enjoyed it very much. Then they played Men at Work. What a beating.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Animal Groups
Army of Frogs
Murder of Crows
Gang of Elks
Mob of Emus
Lounge of Lizards
Parliament of Owls
Rhumba of Rattlesnakes
These are some animal group names for your infotainment. Please submit your suggestions for what to call a group of Sock Monkeys...they were not on the internet list I found.
PS I hate made-up word like infotaiment.
Murder of Crows
Gang of Elks
Mob of Emus
Lounge of Lizards
Parliament of Owls
Rhumba of Rattlesnakes
These are some animal group names for your infotainment. Please submit your suggestions for what to call a group of Sock Monkeys...they were not on the internet list I found.
PS I hate made-up word like infotaiment.
Roots
During my visit to Indiana, my cousins and I were discussing our roots. My great aunt Mary, who is indeed great (and I'm not just saying that because I heard she reads the blog...she is really cool. She is 80 years old and last year on the cruise, she went parasailing with us. I reckon sky-diving is next), anyway, Mary filled us in on a little family history. As it turns out, my great great grandmother (mom's mom's dad's mom), Stella, was a full-blood Seminole. And not only that, she was the Madame at New Albany's town brothel. Mary is trying to find some photos, and if she does, I'll post them here. The house is long gone now.
I am excited about my native American roots. We figured out that all of us cousins are 1/16 Seminole, actually a little more, because another great-grandfather was part Seminole too. It turns out you have to be at least a quarter to be officially in the tribe, but I am still going to claim my Indian-ness anyway. I knew there must be some reason I disliked Andrew Jackson so much. My cousin Ben said he was going to write to Pres. Jackson's great great grandchildren and ask for compensation, because they are 1/16 responsible for 1/16 of our suffering. I don't want any compensation, but it would've been nice to have gotten some of that good olive skin out of the deal though.
Anyway, I encourage all of you to talk to the people in your families who have been around the longest. They have lots of interesting stories to tell. Thanks, Mary!
I am excited about my native American roots. We figured out that all of us cousins are 1/16 Seminole, actually a little more, because another great-grandfather was part Seminole too. It turns out you have to be at least a quarter to be officially in the tribe, but I am still going to claim my Indian-ness anyway. I knew there must be some reason I disliked Andrew Jackson so much. My cousin Ben said he was going to write to Pres. Jackson's great great grandchildren and ask for compensation, because they are 1/16 responsible for 1/16 of our suffering. I don't want any compensation, but it would've been nice to have gotten some of that good olive skin out of the deal though.
Anyway, I encourage all of you to talk to the people in your families who have been around the longest. They have lots of interesting stories to tell. Thanks, Mary!
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Monkey Book
Leisure-Monkey
I'm glad to hear that people have been enjoying these monkey pictures, and I think the book is a great idea. I was thinking before that I might make a little book for my nephew, but I guess if you guys think I should aim higher, well, what have I got to lose? I was telling Kev this morning I should get a grant from the Children's Book Grant People and do a whole geography series starring Ralph reporting from different exciting locations around the world, starting with Alaska, but Kev said probably no one is going to give me money to circumnavigate the globe with a monkey made of sock. Dangit. Alaska will have to wait. Anyway, thanks for the encouragement, and Marty, I like your combo idea and can't wait to hear Kim's theme song.
Friday, June 24, 2005
Tornado Slide
When I was a kid in New Albany, we used to go spend time at the generically-named Community Park. Community Park had a slide which was unofficially known as the Tornado Slide, and it was the ultimate slide for all New Albany youth. I was surprised on my recent visit to find it was still there. I wanted to slide down it so bad, but the turns were pretty sharp, and I wasn't sure I could fit. So, I sent Ralph instead. These pictures are dedicated to Julie and Kathy because they are fans of the monkey shots. Also thanks to my dad for taking me to the park and participating in silliness.
Friday Frog Fun Facts
- A group of frogs is called an ARMY
- Frogs have teeth, toads do not
- Ranidaphobia is the fear of frogs
Thursday, June 23, 2005
A Word about the Turtle Stool
Turtle Stool
Here is the turtle stool that Kev made me for Christmas a couple years ago and recently blogged a blog about. I love my turtle stool. It helps me reach things I would otherwise have to ask for help with. I use it all the time. I assure you that is a happy place. The reason I sit on it when in despair is exactly that! I still there for comfort when I am distressed. It makes me feel better. Kev is right about one thing, though...I probably DO look pretty forlorn. Sorry Kev.
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