Wednesday, May 08, 2013

Firefly Head

If you have ever wondered what it is like to be inside my brain, you can imagine it like this:

On a good day, it's like watching a firefly.  One minute, it lights up over there, the next minute, it lights up over here, and so on.  On a bad day, it's like watching a swarm of angry bees.  By the way, do you call them fireflies or lightning bugs?  We always called them lightning bugs when we were kids.  We would catch them in my cousin's back yard and put them in baby food jars. Somebody would put holes in the jar lids, but it didn't seem to do much good.  Dead by morning.  Poor lightning bugs.

See what I mean?  I sort of go from topic to topic.  Sometimes slowly and logically, sometimes frantically and crazed.  It gets worse when I have a lot of Big Things going on in addition to regular life.  Like right now.  So, for example, today I have been thinking about the camping trip this weekend, the Daisy bridging ceremony in a couple weeks, the end-of-the-year Daisy party (date TBD), Camp Tag-Along (which isn't until August but the planning stages have begun), the book which I haven't finished for book group, Daphne's karate situation, Staff Appreciation week at school, Mother's Day, Daphne's birthday, family illnesses, appointments I need to make, the overdue library books, and a variety of other things.  In no particular or logical order.  So, I'm getting SOME things done, and checked off the list, but not in a very efficient manner.  And I think this is why I am sometimes awake at three in the morning thinking about stuff.  Instead of sleeping, I am planning what I am going to say at the bridging ceremony, even though it's a few weeks away, and I'm worrying about the baby robins (see fluff in photo above) which I didn't actually see moving until yesterday (alive and well!), and I'm fretting about trying to make a camp fire in the rain.  It's kind of exhausting.

I wonder if I need to make myself a schedule of blocks of time to dedicate to each thing on my brain list.  I wonder if I gave myself 20 minutes of fretting time each day, if that would keep me from fretting the rest of the day.  I doubt it.

Be very very glad you are not in my brain.

Kev says he can make his brain stop on command.  I believe him.  There are times when I can look at him and tell he is thinking about absolutely nothing.  It's amazing.

I can only make my brain stop when I am on vacation.  I am really looking forward to being on a vacation.

Right now, though, I am going to go sit on the porch and wait for Daphne's bus.  I will attempt to Be Kev and think about nothing while I'm there. If I make it more than 30 seconds, it will be a new record.



jilly donuts said...

My brain is the same. Unnerving. If you figure out a way to stop the madness, let me know. Perhaps wine? :-)

I grew up with lightening bug but now say firefly.

Gye Greene said...

In the Seattle area, we say firefly -- although we don't have any. Also that guy from the band Owl(!!!) City has the song called Fireflies. So he must not be from Texas.

Dead by morning: maybe fireflies are actually vampires, and the sunlight kills them.

Kev not thinking of anything: Zen Kev.

Maybe a trick is to think **about** something, but have it be boring or peaceful. Like a nice white chicken egg.