Thursday, February 23, 2006

The Last Straw

Picture me as Yosemite Sam, so mad that my feet lift up off the ground and my hat comes off and floats above my head while steam comes out of my ears.

It's the garbage collectors again. They are my (what's the plural form?) nemesis.

For Christmas, my parents got me a nice big trash bin with a handle and wheels. I can easily roll it out to the curb and back, even when it's full. Our old bin had no wheels, and the handles on the sides that were hard for me to reach because I have short arms, and impossible now because my belly's in the way. If it was full, I had to drag it to the curb which made an awful racket and drew attention to me, which I didn't like, especially because I usually take out the trash in my housepants and hair all disheveled. Anyway, as you know if you read this much, our garbage collectors have a habit of hurling the empty bin in the general direction of the address they got it from, and it often lands in the street or the yard or the driveway . They never, ever place it gently back on the curb where they got it. And today, they broke the handle off my new rolling bin. It cannot be fixed. I am so mad. This means war. How I will wage war on the trash men, I do not know, but I will find a way.

While I'm at it, I might as well wage war on the insurance industry too, but that's another blog...

5 comments:

Gye Greene said...

How handy are you and/or Kev? Rather than repairing the handle, could you bolt on a supplemental one?

Garbo revenge (in Aussie-land they're nicknamed ''Garbo s''): Maybe I shouldn't say this, but -- a wheelie bin (i.e. your style of garbage can) half-full of used diapers, then filled with water.

Water is very dense; thus, heavy.

Boy-howdy.


--GG

tschy said...

GG has it on the nose. Once Peanut arrives, you will have plenty of options. Just be sure to not wrap them tight. Save a few to put on the top of the pile. New baby poop stinks...so much so that it will amaze you that such a cute little thing could smell like that.

goostermon said...

Here's the thing .... while revenge would be sweet, it really only begets more and worse problems. What you want is for them to change what they do and how they do it. Complaining to the garbage company may be all that's required. Talking to the garbage slingers themselves and asking for their cooperation might work. But chances are (life has taught me) a belligerent attitude will only get you more of the same.

I'd suggest that they owe you a new garbage can - and that a company representative needs to come visit to see the damage and hear your complaint. Show him the pictures.

Bleach said...

Shut up DAD! What you need to do is kidnap one of the garbage men and saw his arms and legs off. Use some heat to stop the bleeding and put him in the garbage can. When his friend comes to pick up the garbage he will find his garbage buddy too near death to do any good. Results!

Gye Greene said...

Actually, GooseMan has a good point. Although it's fun (sometimes) to fantasize about revenge, working things out cooperatively is usually more productive.

Maybe leave 'em a note?

And, yeah -- damage to the cans getting paid by the garbage co. -- good point.

--GG