Things That Baffle Me

1. People that talk on their cell phones while using public restrooms
2. People that litter
3. People that throw cigarette butts out their car windows during "explosive fire warning" days
4. People that are mean to little kids, old people, or animals
5. People that make stuff up to impress other people
6. People that don't give you a friendly wave after you let them in front of you in traffic
7. People that go hauling a$$ down the median when traffic is slow/stopped on the expressway
8. People that park their shopping carts in the middle of the aisle and just stand there blocking
9. The behavior of my garbage collectors
10. People who don't hold the door open when they know you are right behind them
11. People who don't wash their hands after going to the bathroom, especially in restaurants
12. People who talk on their cell phones in cars or restaurants
13. Other

If I had my own island, Taratopia, all of these things would be grounds for removal from the island. Maybe I'd let people have one warning first, but generally, poor citizenship would not be tolerated. Plus, there would be 4-day work weeks and 3-day weekends, mandatory nap time, and people would have to eat dinner with their families at least 5 times a week. I was going to make the island a Mustard-Free zone, but then Kev wouldn't come and live there with me. There would be no cars because it would be a small enough island to walk or ride a bike everywhere. There might be a trolley. I like trolleys. There would be owls. There would be no Jethro Tull music.