Thirteen weeks down, more to go than I care to think about. I am now in the second trimester, and just as everyone said, I am starting to get my energy back. The exhaustion has been replaced by what can only be described as pregnancy-induced A.D.D. I cannot seem to concentrate on anything for more than 30 seconds, and this is bad because I have a lot of stuff that needs concentrating on. For example, I am having a party this weekend, but I have not done one thing to prepare for it except buy a bag of Holiday M-n-Ms at Target. I know it's not a party without M-n-Ms, but at the same time, I'm SURE it's not a party with ONLY M-n-Ms. I have also not accomplished much in the way of Christmas shopping, and I'm usually almost done by now. I have get on the ball, because we have to ship a lot of stuff this year since we're staying in Texas. Anyway, I am not going to worry about all this. I'll get everything done. Eventually.
The other night, I was worried about the baby and then I had this dream: I was standing in my house, and a bright light came down from outside. It was a UFO hovering above the house. Apparently, the aliens had come with messages from the baby, which were projected ticker-style across a light fixture on my ceiling. There were several messages, but I only remember these two:
"I am only interested in the truth"
and
"In the morning, I like shapes. In the afternoon time, I like shapes."
So, I'm not sure what to make of all that. Kev reckons the PPHPHB should write a shape song though, using those lyrics. I am on board with that.
Anyway, I am not worried about the baby anymore. Not because of the aliens, but because I went to the doctor and heard the baby's heartbeat which was good and strong.
I'm thinking about telling a rock and roll story in my next blog.
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5 comments:
Hm -- shapes are good...
Baby-in-womb heartbeats sound like a wet helicopter, don't they? :)
--GG
I said it when it happened and I stand by it....That shapes business is some of the scariest stuff I have ever heard.
I have to admit, I've been a little concerned about all this recent alien activity in our household. I submit to you the following evidence for your impartial examination.
FACT: Tara experienced the phenomenon known as "Lost Time", documented in her 28 July blog entry:
http://housepants.blogspot.com/2005/07/lost-time.html#comments
There was another "Lost Time" epsisode a few months ago, in which she was driving along her usual route and suddenly became completely disoriented. I couldn't find a blog entry for it though.
FACT: There has been a recent series of incidents involving owls (which, according to leading UFO experts, are harbingers of Lost Time). Owl Incident #1 is well documented in this blog entry:
http://housepants.blogspot.com/2005/05/eastern-screech-owl-2-this-morning-i.html#comments
OK, so perhaps this is a little shakey since it happened to my sister. But the owls were definitely homing in on their prey.
Owl Incident #2 occured in August while we were on vacation in Hyde Park. First, my bother-in-law Marty heard an owl in the woods behind my parent's house. So the next night we stayed up hoping to hear it again. Alas, we went to bed owl-less, but we did encounter a bat in an umbrella the next day.
Owl Incident #3 happened a few days later, at the Dutchess County Fair. This time there was no denying it - a real live owl:
http://housepants.blogspot.com/2005/09/state-fair-warm-up.html#comments
It doesn't take a Rocket Scientist to work backwards and find a correlation between the owls and the date of Tara's pregnancy.
We saw yet another owl at the State Fair of Texas in September:
http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5200/533/1600/owl.jpg
I suspect that this owl was checking up on things.
FACT: The aliens are now allowing the baby to communicate to Tara through her dreams.
All this was fine with me, really. I mean, I'd love the kid whether or not it was mine or was the result of some alien tampering. Although I'd kinda prefer it to not have a forked reptilian tongue like the alien baby in that 80's TV series "V":
http://www.tv.com/v/show/398/summary.html
but I suppose a tonguectomy would solve this problem.
As I pondered the ramifications of having an alien baby on my way to lunch today, I reflected on the dream messages:
"I am only interested in the truth"
and
"In the morning, I like shapes. In the afternoon time, I like shapes."
Then I suddenly had an epiphany: these are exactly the kinds of obtuse statements *I* make all the time! Tara can back me up on this. And yes, the "obtuse/shapes" pun is intended.
So, I'm pretty sure now that the kid is mine. Nice try, aliens.
-K.
Ah, but what if Kev is ONE OF THEM?
THE WHOLE X FILES SERIES IS NOW AVAILABLE ON DVD.
I SUGGEST THAT THE TWO OF YOU TRY THIS OR THE SCI FI CHANNEL.
TWO NEW BABY NAMES:
MULDAR AND SCULLEY.
THE TRUTH IS OUT THERE.
YALLS NEXT ALBUM COULD BE A ROCK
OPERA LIKE QUEENSRYCHE OPERATION MINDCRIME.
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